Tuesday, May 20, 2025

Long Live Faded Photographs & Faded Youth

 May 20, 2025

   Ever since I was just a tyke reading True West magazine, I have always loved old, faded photographs. Perhaps that's why I often emulate the phenom in my sketch books.

Daily Whip Out: "Faded Beauty"


Daily Whip Out: "Faded Love"

Daily Whip Out: "Faded Bushwhacker"


Daily Whip Out: "Faded Warrior"

Daily Whip Out: "Faded Glory"

Daily Whip Out: "Faded Resolve"

Daily Whip Out: "Faded Haggler"

Daily Whip Out: "Flag Day"

"Faded photograph
Covered now with lines and creases
Tickets torn in half
Memories in bits and pieces
Traces of love long ago
That didn't work out right
Traces of love. . ."
—Classics IV, "Traces (of Love)"

Monday, May 19, 2025

When Billy the Kid Was A Girl

 May 19, 2025

   We are doing a cover story on Billy the Kid for the July-August issue and in our coverage we have a feature by James B. Mills on Billy the Kid before Walter Noble Burns "discovered" the Kid in 1926 with his groundbreaking book, "The Saga of Billy the Kid." Turns out there were many more Billy the Kid books and movies than we previously had known, including a 1911 movie starring a girl as the Kid:   

Billy the Kid as A Girl

   I know what you're thinking: Hey Bob, you totally made that up. Well, no, I didn't. Here's the actual photograph I took this image from.

Edith Storey in "When the Tables Turned"
also released in 1911

   Now, do you believe me? Here is some background on Edith:


   Edith Storey, the first thespian to play “Billy the Kid” on a silver screen, was born in New York City on March 18, 1892. Her film career began in 1908. She played the lead role in Billy the Kid three years later in 1911. “A very fine picture,” the Arkansas City Daily Traveller announced. “It was the story of a girl who from birth had passed as a boy. This picture was enjoyed by the audience.” The Western Comedy film was well-received by other critics and moviegoers across the United States, the United Kingdom, and Australia. “The girl leads the life of a cowboy until she is 16 years of age, and her sex is discovered through an encounter with a band of outlaws,” the Idaho Statesman declared on September 3, 1911. “This production has many laughable situations. It is both convincing and enjoyable and worth going miles to see.” Edith Storey starred in numerous other silent Western films, including The Immortal Alamo (1911) and As The Sun Went Down (1919), before she retired from acting at the age of 29 in 1921. Having starred in over 140 silent films throughout her career, Storey eventually received a star on the Hollywood Walk Of Fame. Edith worked as a village clerk in Long Island for decades prior to her death in Northport, New York, on October 9, 1967.

—James B. Mills


The More Things Change. . .

   The irony of all of this is that I received a script for a movie that will begin filming in the fall, "Billie The Kid" about a young girl and her father who get an old timey photograph taken at a Wild West town and get transported back to Lincoln, New Mexico where the girl is take for, ahem, Billie The Kid. The film, written and conceived by David Risotto begins filming this fall at Old Tucson and Mescal and is being financed by Honey Creek Studios out of Kentucky.


"The more things change, the more they remain the same."

—Old Vaquero Saying

Sunday, May 18, 2025

A Bonafied Guero Spills The Beans On A COVID Western!

 May 18, 2025

   Hard to escape the label of "Cultural Appropriation" these days. That's why I created this guy:

Daily Whip Out:

"El Guero de Divisadero"

   All the trappings of the stuff I dig, without the inevitable, "You have no right to appropriate someone else's culture. . ." condemnation. And, by the way, for all you non-Spanish speakers, guero is light-skinned and is an affectionate term, unlike gringo.

   Also, from time to time I return to a scene I am trying to capture. It was inspired from a line from Insurgent Mexico by John Reed: "the riders appeared on the ridgeline suspended in amber."

Daily Whip Out:

"Ridgeline Riders Suspended In Amber #33"

(A work in progress)

  Sometimes I see things in a different context, like this snapshot I took while talking to Craig Schepp on my patio yesterday.

Spaces

  Well, if you want a new version of the Western, it's about to land on July 18:

A COVID Western!

   There is a new COVID Western coming out that got a seven-minute-standing-ovation at Cannes last week and it is called Eddington. It's about a small town New Mexico sheriff (Joaquin Phoenix) going up against a local politician (Pedro Pascal) in a run for mayor. Here is a snippet from an online review:

   "Set in 2020, amid the pandemic and the wave of Black Lives Matter protests that erupted after the police murder of George Floyd, Eddington initially cleaves to Aster’s usual character template. We are plunged into the daily doings of Sheriff Joe Cross (Phoenix), an impulsive asthmatic who gets so mad about the state mandate requiring him to wear a mask that he decides to run for mayor against long-standing enemy Ted Garcia (Pedro Pascal).

   "In parallel, Joe is losing his wife Louise (Emma Stone) to the web presence of budding cult leader Vernon Jefferson Peak (a sparingly used, scene-stealing Austin Butler). Louise is suffering from a mysterious trauma, doesn’t like to be touched and refers to herself in the third person when stressed. In bouts of wellness, she makes creepy dolls that Joe pays his colleague to buy. Rounding out his household is mother-in-law Dawn (Deirdre O’Connell), who relishes nothing more than berating everyone – her voice is often heard off camera while Joe suffers in the foreground."

   ". . .The screenplay is as fluent in the language of identity politics as it is slogan-driven electioneering as it is Vernon’s sham guruspeak. Eddington stops shy of sermonising, even as it skewers a range of political postures. A young white man hosting a vigil for a murdered Hispanic man self-flagellates, “My job now is to listen, which I’ll do right after I’ve made this speech which I have no right to make!!!”

   "Micheal Ward stands out as the police officer justifying Joe’s comment that “a third of my department is Black!” (It’s a department of three.) His stoic demeanour is a study in micro-acting and when, after one injustice too many, it slips, it suddenly seems like Eddington is his film. But no, this is an ensemble effort. It has a sweep that shows that the Wild West still exists on the ground and online, and a keen eye for the people that grow in a sandy, mountain-flanked, lonely landscape.

—Sophie Monks Kaufman, The Independent 


"It's not what you look at that matters, it's what you see."

—Henry David Thoreau

Saturday, May 17, 2025

Wyatt Earp Revised, Remixed And Reconsidered


May 17, 2025
    It's been awhile since we published the best selling issue of True West ever.

Feb-March,  2001, a pristine copy of this
issue goes for $300 if you can find one.

But, as you no doubt know, when it comes to Earpland, the hits keep on coming. Here is the opening of a rather delicious review in an upcoming issue:

  "Earp’s story has been twisted, whitewashed, blackwashed, and otherwise distorted from the git-go. We can credit Bat Masterson for first mythologizing his old friend in 1907 in the pages of the magazine Human Life. After Masterson, the facts were cooked by professional mythmakers such as Walter Noble Burns (Tombstone: An Iliad of the Southwest, 1927) and Stuart Lake (Wyatt Earp, Frontier Marshal, 1931), who were supplied with Hollywood’s decades worth of facts morphed into legend.
   "Later, the facts mutated into darker legends in books by Ed Bartholomew’s Wyatt Earp: The Untold Story (1960) and Frank Waters’ The Earp Brothers of Tombstone (1960). And a nod must be given to the late Glenn Boyer, whose I Married Wyatt Earp (1976), supposedly based on the unpublished memoirs of Wyatt’s widow, Josephine Marcus, was hugely popular.
   "The books of Bartholomew, Waters and Boyer may have lacked historical veritas—I Married Wyatt Earp was later proven bogus and withdrawn by its publisher, the University of Arizona Press— but they succeeded in putting the spotlight on a major player in the Earp story: Josephine “Sadie” Marcus, his companion for the last forty-odd years of his life. Once historians recognized her place in Wyatt’s story, Sadie began to take up more and more of the story until she has practically come to be the story."
—Allen Barra, in the opening of his review of the recent docudrama Wyatt Earp And The Cowboy War

   Of course, Allen Barra is in the infamous P Commission photo taken in front of Hatch's Saloon location on Allen Street in Tombstone the night after a confrontation with a notorious bounty hunter who got me kicked out of Arizona Highways.

The P Commission, 1993
That's Allen Barra squatting at left, Paul Northrop, Casey Tefertiller and me. Back row: Bob McCubbin, Jim Dunham, Robert Palmquist and Jeff Morey. 
Photo by Wyatt Earp
(No, really!)

   Meanwhile, in the even Stranger Than Fiction Zone. . .

 In the so-called Flood manuscript, Wyatt remembered using a telephone to call in a stage robbery. While it's unlikely he did this, there were in fact telephone lines between several mines and the Tombstone Stock Exchange in 1881.

Hello, operator, give me Sheriff Paul please. . .

And, as goofy as this looks, yes, early telephone models had two receivers, one for each ear. Makes sense, actually.

Hugh O'Brian as Wyatt Earp
"Yes, kids some of this is actually kind of true."

I'll be damned if I know what sells.
—BBB putting words in the old man's mouth

"You won't like him. He's not who you think he is."
—The late John Gilchriese

Friday, May 16, 2025

Billy's Big Hands And Small Wrists Begets Big Dream

 May 16, 2025

   Some Kid tidbits are hard to track down. For example, did Billy Bonney actually have small wrists that allowed him to slip out of handcuffs?

Daily Whip Out: "Billy's Slippery Bracelets"

   Here's a better version of Joseph Santley, who portrayed Billy the Kid long before Walter Noble Burns discovered the outlaw.

Daily Whip Out Improved:
"Joseph Santley as Billy the Kid"


   Okay, back to the small wrists. . .

We Get Questions
   "This may sound a bit silly, so my apologies if the answer is already out there and I've somehow overlooked it.  But what are the exact sources regarding Billy the Kid's small hands and tiny wrists? I've read this so many times that I've always just assumed it was true, but do you know where these claims originate? Are there any verified examples of Billy slipping out of handcuffs due to the size of his wrists? Are there any contemporary sources that describe his hand or wrist size?"
—Josh Taylor

   Well, first of all, let me say it pays to know the right person to ask on these types of questions and, well, here you go:
Provided by Mark Lee Gardner
the author of "To Hell On A Fast Horse"
(and, who, it must be noted, turned this
in about two minutes flat)

   Oh, and if you dig all things Billy here' a sneak peek at an upcoming event you might want to check out.

Buckeye's Dream Comes True

"There's no money in it."
—Billy the Kid

Thursday, May 15, 2025

Did Walter Noble Burns Bring Billy the Kid Back from Obscurity?

May 15, 2025

   We've got a barn burner developing on the Billy the Kid front. Our little Aussie Bastard has struck again (twice in the same issue!) and he has uncovered some pretty spectacular evidence of Billy the Kid's stature prior to Walter Noble Burns' "Saga" in 1926. We (and I mean me and Mark Lee Gardner and Fred Nolan and Paul Hutton and Leon Metz and a few hundred other Kid Krazy afficionados) believed that when Walter Noble Burns—on assignment to cover the Pancho Villa attack on Columbus, New Mexico—walked into the Coney Island Saloon in El Paso in 1915 and saw the pistol over the bar and asked about it and the bartender told him it belonged to the most famous badman in the Southwest and when Burns asked who that might be, the bartender said, "Billy the Kid" and Burns said, "Who's Billy the Kid?" And then seven years later, Burns visits his sister in Albuquerque and borrows her car and drives out to Old Fort Sumner and interviews Paulita Maxwell! And then, with the publication of one of the first Book of The Month Club entries, we get this "forgotten" Old West character being resurrected from obscurity in "The Saga of Billy the Kid."

   Well, as you shall see in the next issue, that is simply not true. Hint: there was a movie playing on the Kid when Burns' book came out! There's a ton more, but here is a taste of who you will see.


Joseph Santley as Billy the Kid

LeRoy Sumner, while playing the role of
Billy the Kid in 1908. 

Nolan Cane in the role of

Billy the Kid in 1912. 

 

  Yes, this is the work James B. Mills and he has done it again. Bravo to our favorite little Aussie Bastard!


The Day I Met Pocho Suavo

   He came around a corner in old Suchitoto, flinging  his quirt at the flys on a crumbling adobe wall. He was singing an old song (although later I discovered he just made it up). “Buenos Dias, mi Amigo!” He barked at me as if we had known each other for centuries. Before I could even reply he asked me if I knew the way to El Forte, which I did, and before you could say Sancho Panza, he was riding beside me on a little, scrawny burro he called “Mi Esposa!” At about the five mile mark, I knew all the girls he had a fling with and by the ten mile mark he confessed to me he was descended from Aztec royalty, which might be true because he sure was a royal pain in the ass.


Daily Whip Out: "Pocho Suavo"


     The Mexicans didn't like him because he was too Americanized and the Americans didn't like him for the same reason.

"If you have the courage to define yourself, and take ownership over the terms by which you live your life, something mysterious will happen; the walls will fall away, and the world will open up."

—John Koenig, "The Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows"

Wednesday, May 14, 2025

Somewhere Between a Rooster And A Choking Grizzly

 May 14, 2025

   When one thing ends another begins. Sometimes even as one thing is beginning, another ending forces a new beginning. Yes, I'm in there somewhere. . .

Daily Whip Out: "Amber Rider #3"


   I've been coming back to a familiar captivo.

Daily Whip Out:

"Mickey Free On His Red-Eyed Honker"

   Ever hear a donkey or a mule do their morning call out? Audibly, it's somewhere between a rooster and a choking grizzly.


"A hero is one who knows how to hang on one minute longer."

—Novalis


Tuesday, May 13, 2025

A Native American Femme Fatale?

 May 13, 2025

   Interesting that in fiction or movies there have been very few Native femme fatales.

Daily Revised Whip Out: "Apache Pout"

   Professor Paul Andrew Hutton sites "Run of The Arrow" and "Arrowhead," as examples of "bad In-din women" but I'm thinking more like "Body Heat" and "Chinatown" a real Native Noire would be a breath of fresh air. Okay, hold yer horses. . .


   Boy Howdy! I stand corrected. That is pretty femme and pretty fatale, with a smidge of AY-YI-YI! Proving once again the only thing new in this world, is the history we don't know, or, so said Harry Truman.

   Meanwhile, many nationalities have portrayed the good, the bad and the ugly.

Daily Whip Outs:
"Old West Characters That Fit The Bill"

"The real problem is, people think life is a ladder, and it's really a wheel."

—Charles De Lent

Daily Whip Outs:

"Apaches I Love, On Paper at Least"

   Come to think of it, so many types never make it to the silver screen, like these guys. . .

Daily Flashback Whip Outs: "Naco Policia"

   The longest drum solo in history was 10 hours, 28 minutes, performed by a child sitting behind me on Delta flight #589 from Bangkok to LA.

New Host With The Old Guard
  Amy Gauthier, the new owner of the Ellis Store in Lincoln, with some of the Old Guard historians who showed up for my art show on July 13 of last year. We lost Herb Marsh (second from left) not long after this photo was taken. Yes, that is Paul Hutton at far left and Buckeye Blake next to me and Steve Todd at far right.


"Success is resting on a rotisserie"

—Old Vaquero Saying

Monday, May 12, 2025

Who Made Jesse James A Stone Cold Killer?

    Recently, I got a chance to visit the James family farm north of Kearney, Missouri and while I was there, the director of the museum brought out the original ambrotype of Jesse James taken when he was just a lad. It is an amazing image to ponder.



 What I was struck with was how innocent he looks and I wondered just how and why he turned into the most notorious and legendary outlaw America has ever produced. Or, as Allan Pinkerton basically put it, "The worst man in America, bar none."

Daily Whip Out: "Killer Angel"

   For one thing, I knew Jesse had to have had a teacher, someone who schooled him on the finer points of brutality and living outside the law.

   When the census taker visited the James farm in June of 1860 to count the family, Jesse Woodson James was twelve and attending school, together with his sixteen-year-old brother Frank and ten year old sister Susan. In the fall when Jesse turned 13 he was enrolled for another year of studies, not realizing at the time it would be his last. So, what happened and who was Jesse's teacher?

The Teacher 

   He was born in Hopkins County, Kentucky when his family—two brothers and three sisters—moved to Missouri where his father got a job working on a farm. He was a typical farm boy growing up outside of Huntsville, Missouri. His schoolmates remembered him as a well-behaved and a reserved child. In 1857, the Anderson family relocated to Kansas Territory, on the Santa Fe Trail and settled 13 miles east of Council Grove, Kansas. They didn't realize it at the time but they had moved into the epicenter of a flashpoint that would tear the country apart. The boy's name was William T. Anderson and, in short order, he would become known as "Bloody Bill"


Daily Whip Out: "Bloody Bill"


Taking Sides On A Bloody Trail

May 25, 1863

   Frank James is riding with a rag tag group of Missouri Bushwhackers. After a raid, they stop at his mother's farm north of Kearny and then move on north to a grove of trees not far from the homestead and began to play poker on a blanket, over the goods they have purloined from their Union neighbors.

   Frank James' little brother, Jesse, age 15 is in the field tending to a crop of tobacco along with a male slave. Jesse does not hear the approach of militiamen, who sneak up on him and quickly catch him up by the throat, and dragging him back to the house. Jesse sees that the entire yard is swarming with armed civilians under the banner of the Clinton County Provisionals and the Clay County Unionists commanded by Captain Garth's Company I. These are not federal troops but local militia, responding to the call of Bushwhackers stealing their property and goods, and they are hell bent on tracking down and eradicating what they see as vermin.

   Of course, Jesse's mother and step-father feign ignorance about Frank's whereabouts, but one of the militiamen procures a rope and throws it over a tree branch. Putting the rope around Samuel's neck they begin to hoist him up over the protestations of Mrs. James. Accounts vary on how many times they hoisted him up, but at some point Samuels breaks down sobbing and tells them where the Bushwhackers are (in one version, he leads them to the spot!). In a running fight, five of the Bushwhackers are shot and killed but Frank escapes. This is often sited as the turning point in Jesse's young life.

   Soon enough, both Frank and Jesse are riding with William T. Anderson who they called the "Old Man." Bloody Bill was 25 years old.


How Dangerous Were These Youngsters?

   Under the tutelage of Bloody Bill, the Bushwhackers often wore stolen union uniforms and passed as Federals. It was not uncommon for them to ride up to a farm, call out the man of the house and ask his allegiance and when he saw the uniforms and said he was a Union man they would shoot him down. When they departed with the poor man's wife weeping over her husband's body the young partisan rangers would tip their hat to the lady because, of course, they weren't barbarians, they had manners! 

  One time they caught two troopers on the road, cut their throats ear to ear and then scalped them, tying the bloody scraps to their saddles. "Drunk on blood," as someone described them, they crushed faces with rifle butts, carved noses off, sliced off ears, or sawed off heads and switched their bodies for comic effect. One of them pulled the trousers off one of their victims and then cut off his penis and shoved it in the dead man's mouth. The teenager, Jesse James, had matriculated and completed his education in this culture of atrocity. Now he was about to graduate.

The Battle of Centralia

   On September 27, 1864 Bloody Bill and about 80 men took over the small railroad village of Centralia, looting stores and discovering a barrel of whiskey that they hauled out in the street. Wild enough when sober they soon were roaring drunk. They robbed the passengers of a stagecoach and then stopped an express train on the North Missouri Railroad full of 125 passengers and 25 Union soldiers on furlough from Sherman's army, which had recently taken Atlanta. The passengers were robbed and the soldiers stripped and brutally gunned down with the exception of one sergeant who Anderson intended to keep as a possible hostage exchange. They then torched the train, tied down the whistle and sent it roaring down the tracks. They burned the depot and another train before leaving in the early afternoon.

   At around 4 P.M. a detachment of about 147 Union troops from the 39th Missouri Infantry, led by A.V.E. Johnson arrived. They were mounted on horses confiscated from "disloyal persons." In other words they were riding horses they had purloined from secessionist sympathizers. They were armed with muzzleloading Enfield rifles, while the Bushwhackers are armed with multiple pistols.

   Bushwhacker Dave Pool lured the detachment to an open field above a river bottom about three miles southeast of Centralia. The Union troops dismounted and formed a skirmish line. The rebels came out of the trees on the jump charging up the hill at about 225 strong. Two confederates were hit on the first volley, but most of the shots went high. The Federals never had a chance to reload.

   "We were laying low on our horses, a trick the Comanche Indians practice and which saved our lives many a time."

—Frank James

   It was over in a flash and most of the Union troops were slaughtered, with Jesse James taking the claim for killing the commander, although Jim Cummins later stated that several in the group took that "honor."


The Bloody Death of Bloody Bill

   Major Samuel P. Cox a native of Gallatin, Missouri (a significant location in the later outlaw career of the James brothers) gathered 300 men to take down Bloody Bill and his vicious Bushwhackers. When he receives word where Bloody Bill is camped, Cox sets a trap near Albany, Missouri on October 27, 1864.

Daily Whip Out:

"Bloody Bill Caught Red-Handed"


   So why were these youngsters so vicious?


"You're going to learn that one of the most brutal things in the world is your average nineteen-year-old American boy." 

—Philip Caputo, A Rumor of War

The Boys Who Became Killer

   So, were the James and Younger boys the exception to the rule? Hardly. Historians now estimate that some 100,000 Union soldiers were boys under 15 years old and about 20 percent of all Civil War soldiers were under 18. And by one count 27,000 people died in the Missouri-Kansas conflagration.

Jesse's Dark Turn

   He came out of the war, severely wounded and it took him quite some time to heal. He joined the local Baptist church and a parishioner, Dr. W. H. Price, remembered him: "Jesse joined the Baptist church in this place, after he came out of the army, in 1866. I think he was baptized, and for a year or two acted as if he was a sincere and true Christian. In his early years, and after he came out of the army, he was quiet, affable, and gentle in his actions. He was liked by every one who knew him."

   In September of 1869, he resigned from the church. Was he bored, was he blank? Somehow, he and Frank became obsessed with killing Samuel Cox, the commander of the unit that brought down Bloody Bill. . .it was a dark turn. One that offered no return.

Born in that flash of anger that never goes away.

"Jesse James Born In A Flash of Anger"

   Now you know how Jesse James was educated to become a stone cold killer.

  He is, at best, a composite, like one of those rough police sketches of a suspect described by multiple eye witnesses who can't agree.

  By my count there have been at least 37 movies, so far, on the life of Jesse James. And what does this say about us?

"A distinctly American bandit has been remembered in a distinctly American fashion, through tourism, mass media, and show business."

—Erin H. Turner

Sunday, May 11, 2025

Old Vaqueros In Purgtory And Women In Hell

 May 11, 2025

   Ever meet some crazy guy who always has a smirk on for every occasion?

Daily Revised Whip Out: "Suave Pocho"


   Ever witnessed a vaquero on the border coming over a ridge in a cloud of dust?

Daily Revised Whip Out:
"Ridge Rider In Dust"

   Ever wished you could see a vaquero peering out from underneath his sugarloaf sombrero in hell?

"In hell, women are even more right."

—Old Vaquero Saying

   Or, maybe, you'd like to see it more subtle. . .

Daily Whip Out:

"Old Vaquero In Purgatory"

   Words to live by.

"You know, I didn't write my books for critics and scholars. I wrote them for students and artists. When I hear how much my work has meant to them, well, I can't tell you how happy that makes me. That means that this great stuff of myth, which I have been so privileged to work with, will be kept alive for a whole new generation. That's the function of the artists, you know, to reinterpret the old stories and make them come alive again, in poetry, painting, and now in movies."

-Joseph Campbell, author of Hero's Journey and The Power of Myth

   Of course, not everyone appreciates my artistic efforts:

"BBB puts his infantile finger paintings all over the magazine. A child dabbling in watercolors instead of going to art school and learning how to draw."

—Jerry Weddle

Saturday, May 10, 2025

La Luz de Divisadero

 May 10, 2025

   Artists live for Happy Accidents. They are literally goof-ups that end up being better than your original intention.

Original Loosey Goosey Wash for
La Luz de Divisadero

   Had a couple happy accidents on this gouache study trying to capture beatific light in the encroaching dust of a slot canyon. It definitely wasn't what I intended but it was so much better than what I thought I wanted. Thus the term: Happy Accident. Had to stop and do an insurance scan just in case I ruin it with the floating apparition of a Majacava Beauty I want to put in the middle of that light. You know, like this:

Daily Whip Out:

"Everything He Wanted Was On

The Far Side of Divisadero"

   I know what you're thinking: "Hey, aren't you a little old to be playing in the mud like a two-year-old?" Well, if you're thinking that, go ask Minnie.

"He's painting to beat the band."
—Minnie Hauan Bell

Source analysis: When a band is performing, it often grasps the attention of everyone around since bands are loud and both visually and audibly entertaining. If something “is beating the band,” it is being done so greatly that it is visually and/or audibly overpowering the band. This hyperbolic expression compares an occurrence to a band to capture the extent to which something is being done. If the rain is beating the band, for example, it must be raining so hard that it is loud and/or visually shocking.

—Ava Oliver, USC Digital Folklore Archives

Carl and Minnie Bell

on their wedding day 1918

Oh, and Minnie is my Norwegian grandmother

from Thompson, Iowa

"Kun-du-stuk-en-usk?"

How I heard my grandmother say,

"Can you speak Norwegian?"

"Snakker du norsk?"

—How you apparently say, "Do you speak Norwegian?"

Lost In Childhood Translation?

"You know how in baseball they throw the ball into the crowd after they win a game? That's not allowed in bowling. I know that now."

—Old Mother's Day Joke