October 23, 2024
I agree with Gabby.
"Dagnabbit! What in tarnation
is going on with our nation?"
Gabby Hayes And His Creative G-Rated Swearing Is, Frankly, Sorely Missed.
Where might all of this be going? Jack has a vision. . .
This just in:
It is the year 2248. We live in what some would call a perfect world. There are no diseases, or hangovers. there is no fighting, except between women, for entertainment purposes. If you hear about a party, they have to let you in. It's the law. And they can't kick you out, no matter what you do.
But there is a dark side to our world. There is no funny cowboy dancing. It is forbidden by the High Council. No one wearing a cowboy hat or cowboy boots may get up in front of others and do a dance that would be considered "outlandish" or "unserious." This includes funny spinning, funny stomping, and funny sashaying. You don't even have to be wearing the cowboy boots on your feet; moving them with your hands is also a crime.
It's no longer safe to wear a cowboy hat at all. Especially a cowboy hat that is comically large or small. A friend of mine was arrested for walking down the street with a tiny Mexican sombrero on his head. He was never seen again.
—Jack Handey, in The New Yorker
Daily Whip Out:"Tiny Sugarloaf Busted!"
"If everybody is wearing a big hat, ain't nobody wearing a big hat."
—Old Vaquero Saying
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