May 18, 2006
Another storm blew in last night, but the weather goobers (meteorologists) are warning us it’s not the summer monsoons (or the “Guacamuggies” as we christened them on our old radio show). Didn’t get any moisture, but it blew and blew.

We had a staff get-together-dinner down at Mimi’s in Desert Ridge at six last night, and as I drove down I could see the wall of dark blues up over the McDowells and across the Bradshaws. Very dramatic lighting. And windy. Tumbleweeds and styrofoam coolers blowing across Tatum. Had to pull over and secure the top to my magazine carrier in my pick-up bed.

I asked Mimi’s hostess where a “big-ass party of misfits” was sitting and she said, “Oh, you mean the Abby party?” Yes, Abby Pearson set up the dinner and I found Robert and Beatrice Ray, Sue Lambert, Abby, Bud and Carole Glenn, Samantha and Jason, Joel Klasky, Rob Bandhauer and Mark Boardman all seated at a long table in the back room. Had the blackened cajun salmon and an “Arnold Palmer” (iced tea and lemonade). Great time visiting with everyone ($20 cash).

As I was leaving Desert Ridge I noticed one of my favorite restaurants has bitten the dust: Rock Fish was dark, and the vacant building looked sad and forlorn. I loved that place. It had a Minnesota Fishing Lodge theme with knotty pine and big kitschy Field And Stream style paintings. Great food too! And it seemed packed everytime we went there. Tough business. Almost everyone I know has the conceit that they could open and run a successful eatery. That is, everyone but me. Having married into a restaurant family and hearing the daily horror stories I would not want anything to do with one. Now, if only someone had warned me about the magazine business. . .

Fight The Tsunami, Or Ride It?
“You have it right. The Internet is an opportunity for writers and publishers and academics much more than a danger or a limitation. Magazines on paper will be around for many years -- at least until I check out, when my interest in such matters will fall off dramatically. I would not think of reading the ATLANTIC MONTHLY, NEW YORKER, or TRUE WEST online. Curled up in an easy chair under warm light with a cold drink, that's the reading ticket.”
—Dan Buck

Check This Out: Lonesome Dove Exhibit Website
http://www.library.txstate.edu/swwc/ld/ldexhibit1.html

About ten different people have forwarded me the following humor bit:

Top Ten Old West Phrases That Will Never Sound The Same After That Damned Gay Cowboy Movie

1. "I'm gonna pump you fulla lead!"

2. "Give me a stiff one, barkeep!"

3. "Don't fret---I've been in tight spots before."

4. "Howdy, pardner."

5. You stay here while I sneak around from behind."

6. Two words: "Saddle Sore."

7. "Hold it right there! Now, move your hand, reeeal slow-like."

8. "Let's mount up!"

9. "Nice spread ya got there!"

10. "Ride'em cowboy!"

We all laughed and enjoyed it and even considered using it in our Last Stand humor section of the magazine, but after sleeping on it, I’ve decided to pass on it. (Maturity? Or Old Man Syndrome? Probably both.)

Royal Wade Kimes Rides The High Country
True West is supporting The First Annual Mount Royal Trail Ride, October 6th & 7th in the beautiful Ozark Mountains, just north of Fort Smith, Arkansas. So saddle up with Royal Wade Kimes on October 6-7, 2006 in the beautiful Ozark Mountains just north of Ft. Smith Arkansas. The ride will be an opportunity to see some of the most incredible scenery you’ve ever laid eyes on while supporting two very worthwhile charities that have a real soft spot in this cowboy’s heart.

Part of the proceeds from the trail ride and concert will go to Meals for Kids, The Backpack Program and Future Farmers of America.

The trail ride will feature breathtaking views, authentic chuck wagon cooking, campfire entertainment and a cowboy’s mercantile with the latest in saddlery, horse trailers, RVs and sport utility vehicles for today’s cowboys and cowgirls. The ride will end on Saturday with a chuck wagon BBQ and ranch concert by Royal Wade Kimes and his band. The weekend promises to be relaxing, rewarding and very entertaining! Come join us for some incredible Ozark scenery, biscuits in the ground, cowboy coffee and the best Country and Western music there is, bar none! Check it out at:

Royalwadekimes.com

Favorite Onion Headline de Jour
Garroting Survivors Call For Wire Ban

”Your opponent, in the end, is never really the player on the other side of the net, or the swimmer in the next lane, or the team on the other side of the field, or even the bar you must high-jump. Your opponent is yourself, your negative internal voices, your level of determination."
—Grace Lichtenstein