Ontario Crank Mail

 May 1, 2024

   Sometimes we get cranky mail. This is a good example:

"I recently bought your March/April issue in Saint Thomas, Ontario. Very good magazine. However the cover was the ugliest choice you have made in a long time. I'll bet it isn't selling as well as your previous magazines. I blame it on the choice of the cover. The picture of Chief of Scouts Al Sieber would have been a far better choice."

—Paul Gordon

Saint Thomas, Ontario, Canada

   Given his shaky, cursive handwriting I naturally assumed he is very old (perhaps even as old as I am). He included his phone number, so I called him and he hung up on me. Of course, I had to send him a Bozecard with this note:

Paul,

   Got your cranky letter about my True West cover (Tom Mix, March/April) and tried to call you but you hung up on me. Thanks!

—Boze

   That should freak him out royally, or, at least he might say to himself, "What in the Sam Hill?" Look for Paul's letter in the next issue of True West.

"I would have sent you a shorter letter, but I didn't have the time."

—Mark Twain