December 29, 2014
it's time to talk scatalogical, and by that, I mean bum guns. Adapted from the French, the bum gun is in full use here in Thailand. The bum gun is a spray nozzle that you apply to your nether region after a bowel movement to hose out potential dingleberries and to nip in the bud the dreaded "E-Dub," which is slang for "the eternal wipe." For some reason, probably homophobic related, American males do not like to spray their bottoms with a hose. Perhaps this is why Canadians refer to us as "Hosers." Or, maybe not.
![](http://api.ning.com:80/files/Zv0e1bgizgITOb-XSpCqPulSxjm-DPxvVtb0*k9WPVnHZoHIwahCJJJXOINeD7zI0Sc8IO5LuaGziF-v1CAWBO-1QtCtv3B1/thaimovieposter.jpg)
I have had Thai fish eat my feet:
![](http://api.ning.com:80/files/Zv0e1bgizgLXliXzorW1gCoguxQ0wiSltooLMpEuNwDy4zh4dq0fI4p2SrPplnqxjbIqdGcxGwSv6IXDztzXwDU9JQ0Hu2ac/fishsocks.jpg)
Foot Fish Devour BBB's Dead Skin
But, somehow spraying my rectum area with a hose seems too much.
"FDA to Americans: just eat a God-damn vegetable!"
—Onion Headline