November 15, 2020
Enough Kid stuff. Let's get serious about some mules again.
Miss those long-eared mulas (Spanish for "mules"). You know what else I miss? Paul Lynde.
Q: Why would you pound meat?
A: [Paul Lynde] Loneliness?
The things people do to make themselves attractive. Like the women that do the lip liner like it's a dead body at a crime scene. I would like to say to all women on behalf of the men of planet Earth, "We see your lips." You want to highlight with a little color, fine. You don't need to put a ground marker. We're not parachuting in.
—Jerry Seinfeld, "Is This Anything?"
"It's called quarantine coffee. It's just like normal coffee but it has margarita in it. And, also, no coffee."
—Old Quarantine Saying